You've got to be crazy, it's too late to be sain. You've got to go full tail bozo, cuz you're only given a little spark of madness. And if you lose that you're nothing. Don't ever lose that cus it keeps you alive.
Theoretically possible that only people who are a little bozo are interested in living, and that the moment the last bit of bozo slips away the will to survive is diminished.
