GOODMORNING TWETCH
Lance is an uncommon name nowadays.
But in medieval times people were named Lance a lot.
HAPPY EASTER
Have you posted on Twetch today?
GOODMORNING TWETCH
The man who invented throat lozenges died last week.
There was no coffin at the funeral.
Im doing good!
Its been a good day so far. Finally relaxing
How is your Sunday?
GOODMORNING TWETCH
I’m going to have to return the camouflage jacket I bought last week...
I just can’t see myself wearing it.
When is the last time you Twetch'd?
GOODMORNING TWETCH
A priest, a pastor and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked the rabbit: “what's your blood type?”
"I'm probably a type O", said the rabbit.
I asked the waiter if I could get 48 pancakes on a single plate
He said he wasn’t sure, that's a pretty tall order.
GOODMORNING!
GOODMORNING TWETCH
After buying my limousine, I couldn't afford a driver.
All that money and nothing to chauffer it.
My therapist just told me I have extreme difficulty in picking up social cues.
I think she is in love with me.
GOODMORNING TWETCH
A police officer caught two kids playing with a firework and a car battery.
He charged one and let the other one off.
I saw an ad in a shop window, "Television for sale, $1, volume stuck on full"
I thought, "I can't turn that down".